The Unhappy Me thread

[Batalov]

Originally Posted by rogue

... each time I talk to my manager about it, the company seems to be setting a new bar that is higher than the previous bar.

My experience is telling me that this usually means a "no".
What's worse, it may also mean that the company is already doing something different from what it was doing before, and your role slowly becomes obsolete. Take a very sober look at the company's business model and assess if your role is as valuable as it were before. If it isn't -- then not only they will not promote you (and surely they can make you feel that you have to prove something - just to waste your time) but they may as well replace you with someone cheaper, soon.
You can either adapt to stay afloat in this place or search for another place. Leaving before finding another place would be a costly mistake, don't do it without a good reason. Definitely start looking already now.

[ET_]

Originally Posted by rogue

I'm unhappy today because my employer puts the onus of promotions on the employee. In other words, I must prove to my director that I have the skills before they give me a promotion. I have not experienced anything like that before. My experience has been that performance, via reviews, etc., should already provide the details that show that an individual is ready for a promotion.

My issue with this process is that talk a good game will be promoted over people that execute a good game. I am a better executor than talker, so I have to step out of my comfort zone and "toot my own horn" in order to get a promotion. Considering that I set the bar very high for myself and don't always reach that bar, makes this very difficult for me.

Does anyone else here work for an employer like that? I am strongly leaning towards leaving this job (after 15 years) because each time I talk to my manager about it, the company seems to be setting a new bar that is higher than the previous bar. In other words, I'm feeling that some of the criteria have been very subjective which does not sit well with me.

I had similar experiences with similar attitude.
I finally understand that what really matters is that the company would lose a good 10% of income if I left. So when they ask me why I need a promotion, I answer "because without me you would not achieve the same results".

This does not always work well, of course. When the employer gets angry at my answer, I understand it's time to go for a work change...

Luigi

[rogue]

Originally Posted by Batalov

My experience is telling me that this usually means a "no".
What's worse, it may also mean that the company is already doing something different from what it was doing before, and your role slowly becomes obsolete. Take a very sober look at the company's business model and assess if your role is as valuable as it were before. If it isn't -- then not only they will not promote you (and surely they can make you feel that you have to prove something - just to waste your time) but they may as well replace you with someone cheaper, soon.
You can either adapt to stay afloat in this place or search for another place. Leaving before finding another place would be a costly mistake, don't do it without a good reason. Definitely start looking already now.

It took me until about 4:30 AM to digest my anger over this so I didn't get a lot of sleep.

What me off the most is that a peer of mine was given this promotion earlier this year and he didn't have to go under the microscope. He told me that he didn't ask for the promotion. They just gave it to him. My manager compared me directly to him and because I am not perfect like him (based upon his performance reviews), I fall short.

I will give my employer the opportunity to see the problem from my perspective and give me objective and measurable goals (which I have asked for), but I'm not expecting it. My current manager (who is new to management and was a peer up until his promotion to management) has no capacity to empathize. I will be working on my resume this weekend.

[Batalov]

I feel your pain - because what I described was more or less what I learned from my own arc.

Talking about practicalities -- definitely use LinkedIn as a device for the search; >90% HR are using it to learn about candidates or even automatically search for them (your profile at IN is your CV++); so polish your IN profile even before the CV (you can make CV later, from IN).

Good luck!

[rogue]

I had a lengthy talk to my manager on Friday. I think I pushed some buttons to put things in motion. He now has a better understanding of why I am not happy with the situation. This doesn't mean that a promotion is automatic as I still have some work to do, but I no longer feel that the bar is far away. What will be interesting is how long it will take to get there. I can be patient, but how patient remains to be seen.

On a separate sad note, Mental Flossis no longer offering a print edition of their magazine.

[xilman]

I'm only a rustic from a small island somewhere in the Atlantic but I have heard that it is Thanksgiving today and that it's traditional in some parts to consume turkey to celebrate.

Unfortunately the local supermarket has run out of Wild Turkey and I'm having to make do with Jack Daniels. I hope this is OK and I haven't offended too many people.


I also have a particularly viscous cold which I caught from SWMBO.

[petrw1]

Originally Posted by xilman

I also have a particularly viscous cold which I caught from SWMBO.

Is it a MAN COLD?

[fivemack]

My cat Babbage has broken his top left fang to the point that the nerve is exposed. The fang will need to be removed and this will cost about as much as a GTX1070.

[xilman]

Originally Posted by fivemack

My cat Babbage has broken his top left fang to the point that the nerve is exposed. The fang will need to be removed and this will cost about as much as a GTX1070.

[kladner]

Ouch. I have been going through dental issues lately. I really feel for Babbage.

[xilman]

Originally Posted by kladner

Ouch. I have been going through dental issues lately.

Me too.