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Old 2007-07-28, 11:51   #34
Brian-E
 
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Read here about the successful Nigerian Email conference:

http://j-walk.com/other/conf
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Old 2007-07-28, 16:06   #35
mfgoode
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Talking Funny!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brian-E View Post
Well, I have found this thread very funny so far and a good laugh is just what I need sometimes.
And more seriously, I think the thread cannot possibly do any harm but may just serve to highlight the criminal activities in case anyone reading this has not yet received such a mail and might respond naively when they get their first one.
Brian.


Well Brian I didn't want to be a wet blanket. Have you tried the dumb jokes thread? specifically meant to laugh your troubles away? I often go there to get some solace and more rib tickling which I need some times.

Regards your second point You have a hope to prevent or warn any body from "respond(ing) naively'. Suckers will be suckers no matter what you do to prevent them from being taken for a ride. Every one passes through the school of hard knocks and learns on the way.

Look after your self and God will take care of the rest.

Mally

Last fiddled with by mfgoode on 2007-07-28 at 16:07 Reason: Dual quote
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Old 2007-07-28, 16:22   #36
mfgoode
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Arrow Man's meat.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spherical Cow View Post
There is

If the thread topic bothers you, don’t read it; it is clearly labeled in the title, and should be easy to avoid. Personally, I enjoy the insight and humor offered by some of the contributors, and have even learned new things. With or without your permission, I will continue to do so.

Norm


Well Norm one man's meat is another's poison!

Thanks for the tip but if I didnt read this thread I wouldn't know what makes you tick and how you make your imagination run wild.

You need no permission from me and neither do I from you to honestly state
My opinions

A few posts ahead of us when a poster got so pissed off he got away without an admonition from any one. Then why lift the cudgel against me?

Anyway go ahead enjoy your self. Life is shorter than you can think.

Mally
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Old 2007-07-28, 19:44   #37
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Travis the Orgasmic (or should I say "Bucky Sparks"), it appears you've been outed on the Spam-U Alumni page. Though it does look like your ear surgery was successful.
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Old 2007-07-30, 19:48   #38
ewmayer
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Default Y2K Bug could mean big $$$ for you!!!

Alright, who wants this one? I enjoy the curious yet strangely satisfying staccato cadence produced by seemingly random insertion of the parenthesized "(Funds)". The super-duper secret (Funds) secure hidden invisible underground heavily guarded protected giant fortified sequestered (Funds)disguised vault in Dubai also sounds like a cool non-place to (Funds) not visit on your next non-trip to Dubai. (Funds)

Quote:
From: "Mr.Kassi Ehouman" <kassi_eho2@hotmail.com>
Subject: 30/7/07
Date: Mon, 30 Jul 2007 03:53:34 -0600
Reply-to: kassi_eho2@hotmail.com

Dear Friend,
PRIVATE MEMO
My name is Mr.Kassi Ehouman,the Managing Director of the Pan African Bank, Ecobank Senegal.I write to seek your assistance in the execution of this deal which I feel will be of mutual benefit to both of us.

May I take you back to the anxiety created by the Y2K bug in the year 2000, there were strong fears in banking industries of possible collapse and mal-function of the IT and Accounting Network. This apprehension which was fuelled by the views and comments of experts and analyst all around the world prompted members of my office to manipulate undiscovered interest figures with sole aim of profiting from the impending Y2K crises. Though the accounting system suffered minor computer glitches of which we reported a major collapse resulting to an accountability of about $20M (Twenty Million US Dollars). With the passage of the Year 2000 and having covered up the alleged loss of this money till date.We are very confident now to revalidate the shipments documents to your names as the original owner of this consignment(Funds).

A UN Diplomat in Senegal help facilitated the private diplomatic packaging and delivery of this funds to a secret secure vault in Dubai and base on our instructions,this consignment was PLACED in a private secure vault in Dubai without a beneficiary pending our retirement days. We urgently require your co-operation to effect immediate pickup of this (funds)consignment from the private vault in Dubai. As the Managing Director of this bank,I cannot be directly connected to this money thus;I request for your assistance to travel to Dubai and effect claim of this money and as well invest this funds into a lucrative investment in your country till I retire finally next year to join you.

All I need from you is to apply to the management of the private vault in Dubai and present yourself or your company as the original owner of the consignment with them (Having provided all the necessary deposit and shipment details to you), the company will invite you for declaration. I do need to assure you that all the legal documents will be effected in your name and there is no risk involved in this deal if only you will be very sincere to me.

Thanks for your time.
Mr.Kassi Ehouman
Executive Director,Ecobank Senegal
8 avenue Roume BP 9095 cd Dakar Senegal.
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Old 2007-08-09, 19:27   #39
ewmayer
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Default New Converse "Chuck Taylor 419 Signature Series"

And here I thought "Chuck Taylor" was a popular line of Converse retro basketball sneakers -- learn something new every day on the Internet.

The "Ex-President Charles Taylor took me special" bit has me concerned, however - I just hope our dear Mr. Ubaka was above the age of consent at the time of the took-specialing [or would it be the special-tooking?], and was not coerced into any unwanted tooking, whether special or not.

Quote:
Date: Thu, 9 Aug 2007 11:38:32 -0700 (PDT)
From: Johnson Ubaka <jubaka6@phony-address.yahoo.com>
Reply-To: jubaka121@yahoo.co.jp
Subject: Please assist me.

Dear One,

First,I must apologize to you for using this medium to communicate with you about this transaction,though it is my great pleasure in writing you.I am Mr. Johnson Ubaka ,from Liberia. I was employed as a cook/steward in the Presidential Villa of the Executive President of the Federal Republic of Liberia and this is where I came in contact with the Ex-President Charles Taylor who was then the President of Liberia.

During my tenure as the cook/steward in the presidential villa,the Ex-President Charles Taylor took me special untill he was forced out of power due to pressures mounted on him from the international communities, particularly President George W. Bush of The United States of America. He ran to Exile where he was granted political asylum immediately after his exit from power, the rebels from the northern part of Liberia broke into another bloody war which resulted into the killing of my father and two junior sisters. My mother narrowly escaped death in the hands of the rebels after succeeding in amputating her right hand. She is currently taking refuge at the United nations refugee's camp in Guinea Conankry.

During my stewardship in the presidential villa,the Ex-President Charles Taylor made a secret deposit of $5M (Five Million US Dollars) to a reputable security company on my name as the beneficiary.This also can easily be withdrawn or paid to a recommended beneficiary since I can not handle this alone for now, therefore,I wish to know if we can work together and sincerely will appreciate your express acknowledgement of the receipt of this mail so that I can give you comprehensive details on what we are to do immediately.Your suggestions and ideas will be highly regarded and also your percentage will be discussed on your response.

Yours Sincerely,

Johnson Ubaka.
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Old 2007-09-01, 22:33   #40
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Default Women In Prison Want You!

I do so love a juicy Women In Prison theme...some absolutely precious phrasing in this one:
Quote:
From: angela kennedy angelakenn0031@hotmail.com
To: <YoursTruly>
Subject: HELLO
Date: Sat, 1 Sep 2007 09:42:43 -0600

My dear, I am miss Angela from Asmara, Eritrea, single and 21 years old . Immediately after going through your profile i made up my mind to contact you for long term relationship, because you are my choice of trust and i see nothing wrong with the choice that i have made in you. Now that i am in a state of absolute confussion I must let you know that my daddy was the Financial controler to the Common Wealth North African Region.The following information is my purpose of chosing you.

My daddy was killed by unidentified family enemies and my daddy's lawyer and my daddy's brother are among the suspects, they are all against me because of my daddy's properties in Eritrea. Before my daddy died he made me the beneficiary of the amount of 14.5 Million gbp£ in his account with Citi Bank in Dakar, Senegal, i have the bank statement of account in my travelling bag in this prison. on my way travelling to dakar, sengal i arrived this gambia on transit, on the same night i arrived Gambia i was attacked by 2 big boys in my guest house (hotel) room, they robbed me, collected my hand bag that contained all my money, as if that was not enough, they tried to rape me so i collected the nearest object in the room and hit one of them on the head and screamed to the hearing of the neighbouring compounds and people came out and decended on the criminals, the next morning the police came to the guest house and arrested me, since then i have been kept under awaiting trial here in this central prison of Gambia because the criminal i heated died as a result of the severe beating given to him by the neighbourhood.

I am among the girls newly appointed to head the girls sector in this prison, hence i have the advantage to use the prison computer to communicate with you, and i will be very glad to also have a detailed information about you. From here i communicated with citi bank and they said that according to the agreement that my daddy signed with them that i must be present in their bank to claim the money by myself OR that i should appoint a foreign partner who will claim and receive the money on my behalf. the money is my only hope in life. as soon as Citi Bank transfers the money into your bank account, you will use some of the money to get me a lawyer/s to fight for my case and get me out of here, then thesame week of my release you will fly down here in Gambia and i and you will depart to your home in your country together. I want you to help me claim and receive the amount and also be my fund and investment manager.

Reply me only on email: angelakenn6000@hotmail.com ONLY. In your reply do give me your house address so that i will put it in my diary.

Yours sincerely,
Miss Angela Kennedy

Last fiddled with by ewmayer on 2007-09-01 at 22:36
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Old 2007-10-12, 17:52   #41
Spherical Cow
 
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Apparently, an enterprising writer has turned his scam e-mails in to an entire play.

Quote:
ARIZONA DAILY STAR
Tucson, Arizona | Published: 10.12.2007
When Dean Cameron got an e-mail from a Nigerian con artist, the actor didn't immediately trash the forwarded scam letter. Instead, Cameron turned the tables on the con man, wrote him back and turned nine months worth of e-mails into "The Nigerian Spam Scam Scam," a comedy detailing the unusual correspondence.

After more than 150 national and international shows, Tucson audiences can get a glimpse at the curious e-mail messages that make up "The Nigerian Spam Scam Scam," opening Thursday for a three-night run at The Invisible Theatre.

In the spirit of the play, the Star conducted its interview through a chat program with Cameron from his Los Angeles home.

Why did you decide to write the play based on the e-mail?
"Initially, I'd just been sending the e-mails to friends. After a couple of months, they were telling me 'You must do something more with these . . . a play or something.' So I did. We tested a version which was way too long but was a proof, a concept sort-of-thing. When the correspondence finished, I trimmed quite a bit of it and worked with Paul Provenza, the director, on the actual script."

Everyone I know has gotten one of those spam e-mails. What's been the reaction from audiences when they hear about the show?
"It's odd. When I first began performing the show a couple of years ago, I had to spend quite a bit of the intro explaining the e-mail and the scam, as not many people were familiar with it. Now folks are quite aware of the '419 scam,' as we all get several of them a week. So when someone says 'Nigerian Scam' they know what I'm talking about. But to answer your question more specifically, they love it. They're always amazed that I was able to keep this guy on the line for nearly a year, but when you see the show or read the correspondence, you see that the 'Dean Cameron' (character) I was writing as was just crazy enough and just rich enough for the scammer to hang in there."

And for nine months, "Dean Cameron" was a sexually confused Florida millionaire, who loved cats and had retained Perry Mason as a personal attorney. Why and how did you come up with this persona?

"Only my shrink understands; it just happened."

Was it hard to keep that up?

"No, frighteningly simple. The difficulty was in keeping stuff straight, especially at one point (when) I forwarded a scam e-mail from another scammer to 'Ibrahim,' my original scammer. . . . 'Ibrahim' began posing as this other scammer so then I began writing 'Ibrahim' posing as 'Donald,' knowing that it's 'Ibrahim' . . . and now as the scam has evolved with others, I have 'Perry Mason' working with another person to scam me out of money. . . ."

Wow, that's about as complicated as a 'Days of Our Lives' storyline. How did you guys communicate?
"E-mail. . . . Eventually I called 'Ibrahim' and was talking with the voice of 'Dean' and the voice of 'Perry Mason.' I also have been talking to a woman in Peru who apparently loves me and just needs a few thousand bucks for her father's operation so I called her. It's nuts. I also sent 'Ibrahim' a package of goodies."

So what's become of the real "Ibrahim" and does he know about "The Nigerian Spam Scam Scam" production? "He does now. About six months ago, I sent him a press pack for the show. What's interesting is this: He still thinks that Perry Mason is real. So Perry has been working with 'Ibrahim' on his writer royalties for the show as, technically, 'Ibrahim' wrote half of the show. His (real) name is Josef."

Preview
• "The Nigerian Spam Scam Scam"
• Presented by: The Invisible Theatre.
• Playwright: Dean Cameron.
• When: 7:30 p.m. Thursday and 8 p.m. next Friday-Saturday.
• Where: The Invisible Theatre, 1400 N. First Ave.
• Tickets: $25, discounts available.
• Information: 882-9721 or www.invisibletheatre.com.
• Running time: 70 minutes, with no intermission.
• To find out more about 419 scams: Go to www.419eater.com.
Should be an interesting evening at the theater. Perhaps we should combine all of ours and try for a hit TV series.

Norm
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Old 2008-09-23, 16:13   #42
ewmayer
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Default Just call 419-PAULSON

Seen "on the Internet" this morning:

SUBJECT: REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP

DEAR AMERICAN:

I NEED TO ASK YOU TO SUPPORT AN URGENT SECRET BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP WITH A TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE.

I AM MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY OF THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA. MY COUNTRY HAS HAD CRISIS THAT HAS CAUSED THE NEED FOR LARGE TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF 800 BILLION DOLLARS US. IF YOU WOULD ASSIST ME IN THIS TRANSFER, IT WOULD BE MOST PROFITABLE TO YOU.

I AM WORKING WITH MR. PHIL GRAM, LOBBYIST FOR UBS, WHO WILL BE MY REPLACEMENT AS MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY IN JANUARY. AS A SENATOR, YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS THE LEADER OF THE AMERICAN BANKING DEREGULATION MOVEMENT IN THE 1990S. THIS TRANSACTIN IS 100% SAFE.

THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT URGENCY. WE NEED A BLANK CHECK. WE NEED THE FUNDS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. WE CANNOT DIRECTLY TRANSFER THESE FUNDS IN THE NAMES OF OUR CLOSE FRIENDS BECAUSE WE ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER SURVEILLANCE. MY FAMILY LAWYER ADVISED ME THAT I SHOULD LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON WHO WILL ACT AS A NEXT OF KIN SO THE FUNDS CAN BE TRANSFERRED.

PLEASE REPLY WITH ALL OF YOUR BANK ACCOUNT, IRA AND COLLEGE FUND ACCOUNT NUMBERS AND THOSE OF YOUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN TO WALLSTREETBAILOUT@TREASURY.GOV SO THAT WE MAY TRANSFER YOUR COMMISSION FOR THIS TRANSACTION. AFTER I RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION, I WILL RESPOND WITH DETAILED INFORMATION ABOUT SAFEGUARDS THAT WILL BE USED TO PROTECT THE FUNDS.

YOURS FAITHFULLY MINISTER OF TREASURY PAULSON
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Old 2008-09-23, 18:53   #43
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Old 2008-09-26, 17:51   #44
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Subject: FW: IMMEDIATE ATTENTION NEEDED: HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL

URGENT ASSISTANCE - FROM USA

IMMEDIATE ATTENTION NEEDED : HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL

FROM: GEORGE WALKER BUSH
202.456.1414 / 202.456.1111
FAX: 202.456.2461

Dear Sir / Madam,

I am GEORGE WALKER BUSH, son of the former president of the United States of America George Herbert Walker Bush, and currently serving as President of the United States of America. This letter might surprise you because we have not met neither in person nor by correspondence. I came to know of you in my search for a reliable and reputable person to handle a very confidential business transaction, which involves the transfer of a huge sum of money to an account requiring maximum confidence.

I am writing you in absolute confidence primarily to seek your assistance in acquiring oil funds that are presently trapped in the republic of iraq. My partners and I solicit your assistance in completing a transaction begun by my father, who has long been actively engaged in the extraction of petroleum in the United States of America, and bravely served his country as director of the United States Central Intelligence Agency.

In the decade of the nineteen-eighties, my father, then vice-president of the United States of America, sought to work with the good offices of the President of the Republic of Iraq to regain lost oil revenue sources in the neighboring islamic republic of Iran. This unsuccessful venture was soon followed by a falling-out with his Iraqi partner, who sought to acquire additional oil revenue sources in the neighboring emirate of Kuwait, a wholly-owned U.S.-British subsidiary.

My father re-secured the petroleum assets of Kuwait in 1991 at a cost of sixty-one billion u.s. dollars ($61,000,000,000). Out of that cost, thirty-six billion dollars ($36,000,000,000) were supplied by his partners in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia and other persian gulf monarchies, and sixteen billion dollars ($16,000,000,000) by German and Japanese partners. But my father's former Iraqi business partner remained in control of the republic of Iraq and its petroleum reserves.

My family is calling for your urgent assistance in funding the removal of the President of the Republic of Iraq and acquiring the petroleum assets of his country, as compensation for the costs of removing him from power. unfortunately, our partners from 1991 are not willing to shoulder the burden of this new venture, which in its upcoming phase may cost the sum of 100 billion to 200 billion dollars ($100,000,000,000 - $200,000,000,000), both in the initial acquisition and in long-term management.

Without the funds from our 1991 partners, we would not be able to acquire the oil revenue trapped within Iraq. That is why my family and our colleagues are urgently seeking your gracious assistance. Our distinguished colleagues in this business transaction include the sitting vice-president of the United States of America, Richard Cheney, who is an original partner in the Iraq venture and former head of the Halliburton oil company, and Condoleeza Rice, whose professional dedication to the venture was demonstrated in the naming of a Chevron oil tanker after her.

I would beseech you to transfer a sum equaling ten to twenty-five percent (10-25 %) of your yearly income to our account to aid in this important venture. The internal revenue service of the United States of America will function as our trusted intermediary. I propose that you make this transfer before the fifteenth (15th) of the month of April.

I know that a transaction of this magnitude would make anyone apprehensive and worried. But I am assuring you that all will be well at the end of the day. A bold step taken shall not be regretted, I assure you. Please do be informed that this business transaction is 100% legal. If you do not wish to co-operate in this transaction, please contact our intermediary representatives to further discuss the matter.

I pray that you understand our plight. My family and our colleagues will be forever grateful. Please reply in strict confidence to the contact numbers below.

Sincerely with warm regards,

George Walker Bush

Switchboard: 202.456.1414
Comments: 202.456.1111
Fax: 202.456.2461
Email: president@whitehouse.gov


Source
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