Dumb (Jokes) Thread

[lycorn]

On a somehow related note:

A friend of mine just had a bowel malignant tumour removed by surgery. The procedure went well, but he is now nicknamed semicolon.

[xilman]

Originally Posted by lycorn

On a somehow related note:

A friend of mine just had a bowel malignant tumour removed by surgery. The procedure went well, but he is now nicknamed semicolon.

My M-i-L was known for having a semi-colon. She used the term to describe herself.

[VBCurtis]

Professor: "Give an example of a vector space."

Student: "V"

[LaurV]

For who didn't see it yet...
Two plus two is twenty-two...

[retina]

Originally Posted by LaurV

Two plus two is twenty-two...

Good.

But she missed a great opportunity at the end to say $2000 + $2000 = $20,002,000.

[Dr Sardonicus]

Originally Posted by LaurV

For who didn't see it yet...
Two plus two is twenty-two...
<snip>

This reminds me of a 1982 video which I saw in 1983, called "The Institute for Pi Research." (The value was specified by I Kings 7:23 and II Chronicles 4:2, you see...) It was a sendup of then-fashionable demands that "creation research" (young-earth creationism) should be taught as science on an equal footing with evolution.

If memory serves, creationists tried very hard to suppress the video.

And, before that, there was Monty Python's Flying Circus Dennis Moore (January 4, 1973):

'Boxing Tonight' comes from the Empire Pool, Wembley and features the main heavyweight bout between Jack Bodell, British and Empire Heavyweight Champion. And Sir Kenneth Clark ... It's the first time these two have met so there should be some real action tonight...
<snip>
And he's down again, and I don't think he's going to get up this time. (referee counts Sir Kenneth Clark out and holds up Bodell hand) No, so Jack Bodell has defeated Sir Kenneth Clark in the very first round here tonight and so this big Lincolnshire heavyweight becomes the new Oxford Professor of Fine Art.

[masser]

Originally Posted by Dr Sardonicus

This reminds me of a 1982 video which I saw in 1983, called "The Institute for Pi Research." (The value was specified by I Kings 7:23 and II Chronicles 4:2, you see...) It was a sendup of then-fashionable demands that "creation research" (young-earth creationism) should be taught as science on an equal footing with evolution.

Stay classy, Indiana.

[Uncwilly]

Originally Posted by Dr Sardonicus

This reminds me of a 1982 video which I saw in 1983, called "The Institute for Pi Research." (The value was specified by I Kings 7:23 and II Chronicles 4:2, you see...)

That was not a specification of pi. Rather it was a description of an object. If you measure a rimmed vessel around the body and then measure it rim to rim you will get a different ratio than pi. Here is an object like that:https://www.distinctive-decor.com/ma...ds-goblet.html

[Dr Sardonicus]

Originally Posted by masser

Stay classy, Indiana.

Ah, yes, in 1897 the Great State of Indiana was well on its way to legislating th value of .

Hmm, it seems Edwin J. Goodwin had squared the circle, trisected the angle, and duplicated the cube.

That reminds me (my emphasis):

On June 2, 1960, the Honorable Daniel K. Inouye, then a representative from Hawaii, later a senator and member of the Watergate Investigation committee, read into the Congressional Record (Appendix, pages A4733-A4734) of the 86th Congress a long tribute to Maurice Kidjel, a Honolulu portrait artist who has not only trisected the angle but also squared the circle and duplicated the cube. Kidjel and Kenneth W. K. Young have written a book about it called Two Hours that Shook the Mathematical World, and a booklet, Challenging and solving the Three Impossibles. Through a company called the Kidjel Ratio they sell this literature along with the Kidjel ratio calipers with which one can apply the system. In 1959 the two men lectured on their work in a number of U.S. cities, and a San Francisco television station, KPIX, produced a documentary about them called The Riddle of the Ages. According to Inouye, "The Kidjel solutions are also now being taught in hundreds of schools and colleges throughout Hawaii, the United States, and Canada." One hopes his statement was exaggerated.

-- Martin Gardner, How to Trisect an Angle (June 1966 Scientific American)

[xilman]

Sad tidings.

The man who invented predictive text has died.

His funfairs next monkey. May he rust in piss.

[MattcAnderson]

I have a joke for everybody.

How do you catch a unique (pronounced u neek) rabbit?

You (s) neek up on it.

And as a follow up,

How do you catch a tame rabbit?
tame way

Smile, if it was funny.