What if I wanted to mail a package to Iran?
 

If I wanted to mail a package to a private citizen in Iran, Iraq, or [place Islamic country here], what kind of hoops would I have to jump through?

I live in the United States and this is simply a 'What if...?'

No hoops as far as we can tell.

Obviously mail may be opened, x-rayed and searched, but that happens here sometimes too.

The biggest thing to watch out for, from our experience in mailing to other countries, is having your mail stolen or delivered at a very leisurely pace.

You can track your mail, if you are afraid it will get stolen. Alternatively use a private service like Fedex, which might be more reliable.

[QUOTE=Xyzzy;110894]No hoops as far as we can tell.
~ ~
The biggest thing to watch out for, from our experience in mailing to other countries, is having your mail stolen or delivered at a very leisurely pace.[/QUOTE]:smile:

Well! I got my prime button you sent me in record time and intact too

Mally :coffee:

[QUOTE=jasong;110887]If I wanted to mail a package to a private citizen in Iran, Iraq, or [place Islamic country here], what kind of hoops would I have to jump through?

I live in the United States and this is simply a 'What if...?'[/QUOTE]

:smile:

Well Jason the U.S. is more or less on a war footing with Iran. They will treat your package the same way as if an Iranian sent you a package to the U.S. from there, and even worse, as it will probably not reach its destination.

In 1995 or thereabouts I befriended an Iranian lady coming from London to Toronto and offered her accommodation in the Sheraton with me. Well she took an hour to clear thru Immigration and another hour to reach the hotel and that too by cab.

I was there 5 days and I was on the Canadian Mounted police list from the word go. They tracked me everywhere I went and claimed they had me on their cameras in the lobby. A 'friendly ghost cop' would call me every time to tell me how well they knew of my whereabouts ( mostly at the book shops ).

This guy even commented on my sexual prowess in my room. He was just taking a chance, as by force of habit even living in 'friendly countries', I would check for hidden cameras and microphones in my room. When he demanded 100 dollars from me for double occupancy I knew he was a plant.

I informed my company's security and had an armed guard outside my room for my safety!

Well He told me he will be tipping Interpol off on my arrival back to London. Well when I got to London there was no visible action taken.

However in all fairness this was shortly before the plane crash over Scotland.

I'm not sure of my dates (calendar)

With all their surveillance they boobed over the crash, the culprits are still at large and few suspects have been rounded up and sentenced.

As the Biblical saying goes to this effect 'If they do it in the green what would they do in the dry ?' Uncwilly you are free to quote the actual words.

Mally :coffee:

I never know whether or not to believe your fantastic stories, Mfgoode.

But, I suppose if my oddball uncle Eddie can be in charge of delegating electromagnetic frequencies(everything from WiFi to where on the band the Space Shuttle astronauts talk), I can believe someone who starts flamewars deliberately and accidentally can somehow live a life where one would assume, when each persona is thought of as two different individuals, that the meatspace persona has tremendously more common sense than the online persona.

(I'm really not sure if people are going to be able to make sense of the above sentence. My apologies if it flummoxes you. 'meatspace' is a word used by people who spend more time socializing on the Internet than in real life. It simply means to go out and have actual physical encounters with people, as opposed to email, IRC, or IMing.)

[QUOTE=Xyzzy;110894]No hoops as far as we can tell.

Obviously mail may be opened, x-rayed and searched, but that happens here sometimes too.

The biggest thing to watch out for, from our experience in mailing to other countries, is having your mail stolen or delivered at a very leisurely pace.[/QUOTE]

In our experience, loudly labelling your mail -- this works better for packages than letters, obviously -- "NOT WEAPONS GRADE URANIUM" tends to expedite things through Iranian customs. Throw in a pinch of old-fashioned green radium paint [the kind used on luminous watch dials] or a $5 smoke detector [you can even keep the battery], both of which emit harmless but detectable low levels of radiation, that'll help make the ruse convincing. Then just ask the intended recipient to go to the Ministry of COMPLETELY CIVILIAN NON-WEAPONS NUCLEAR POWER to pick up the package, and probably have a good laugh with the nuclear [strike]weapons[/strike] power folks, about the great joke you played on them. "Inshallah, we really fooled you you guys, ha ha!"

For letters, try marking as "NOT A STOLEN HEU CENTRIFUGE DESIGN".

"THE HOLOCAUST IS A FICTION" might get you some approving nods amongst the Iranian customs folks, but doesn't tend to expedite things, because it's only stating the obvious anyway.

U-236-U-238!
 

[QUOTE=ewmayer;110983]In our experience, loudly labelling your mail -- this works better for packages than letters, obviously -- "NOT WEAPONS GRADE URANIUM" tends to expedite things through Iranian customs. .[/QUOTE]

:smile:

Its not as easy as that! Then they will take the recipient for a personal check to check if he has got a light weight bomb strapped onto him and to make sure he is not an 'alien'. Then God help him if he is not circumcised !.
Then comes the clip off and they will rejoice they have converted him!.

Not content with that they will send him to a brain washing/ motivation camp and send him off after that on a mission to enemy shores. He will be trained to be ejected in a froggy suit by a home made Stealth submarine.

I picture a guy walking along 5th Ave singing 'I was walking along singing a song when out of the orange colured skies - Crash! Bang! alakazam!' and he sees Rockerfellow Centre vapourising and all the people in Radio City watching the Rockettes dancers going to paradise! Mission complete!

Hey could I better J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter which sold a million copies in the first week here of opening by giving vent to my powerful imagination?
If you've got the money I got the time!

Mally :coffee:

Ernst,

I'm planning to ship some yellow (sponge) cake to a buddy in Niger. I'll keep your tip in mind when I ship. :smile:

[QUOTE=grandpascorpion;110995]I'm planning to ship some yellow (sponge) cake to a buddy in Niger. I'll keep your tip in mind when I ship. :smile:[/QUOTE]

Mmm ... yellow cake, sounds yummy!

If it's going to Iran, it's probably a good idea to mark it as PERSHIABLE.

[Horrible, awful, miserable pun, I admit].

Ugh, I feel like I just swallowed uranium. Hehe