[QUOTE=only_human;344935]"I told my wife I stored one million Joules at work today. She then asked me, 'And you can't take a few of them home?'" -Dr. Goldstein at his first job in 1976.
via Tu-Anh Tran on g+[/QUOTE]

"Dr. Edelstein" would fit the joke better. :)

[LEFT]Drive up ATMs have braille because the dog can't be expected to drive and use the ATM.[/LEFT]

[QUOTE=chappy;345042][LEFT]Drive up ATMs have braille because the dog can't be expected to drive and use the ATM.[/LEFT][/QUOTE]
While I get the point of the joke, I think the actual reasoning is that blind people tend to value every bit of freedom they can get. So if they can type their own numbers with a bit of help from a friend, then they feel more independent.

Plus, they can keep their PIN private, even when they get help, because the display just shows asterisks. So they just need to understand the concept of line of sight and how to prevent it.

ATM's have braille because they are required to by law. ADA. But, thinking about it ruins the joke.

So this blind guy decides to go skydiving, and all his friends are stilling around with him drinking and trying to talk him out of this crazy scheme.

"You'll kill your self," one says.
"You won't even enjoy it any more than a fan blowing wind across your face," says another.

He shoots down every argument, they have automatic chutes that deploy. It's actually very safe, it is the action that is the joy, whether I can enjoy it the same way as a sighted person isn't the point....etc.

Then one of his friends says, "sure--automatic chutes and whatnot, but you'll still break your legs when you land, there just no way to know that the ground is upon you."

To which he replied, "Well, sure there is--when the dog's leash goes slack."

[SIZE="1"][I]:exclaim: What follows is pointless overanalyzing of pointless jokes, and may be considered hazardous to your sense of humor. Read at your own risk.[/I][/SIZE]
[QUOTE=jasong;345467]While I get the point of the joke, I think the actual reasoning is that blind people tend to value every bit of freedom they can get. So if they can type their own numbers with a bit of help from a friend, then they feel more independent.

Plus, they can keep their PIN private, even when they get help, because the display just shows asterisks. So they just need to understand the concept of line of sight and how to prevent it.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=chappy;345471]ATM's have braille because they are required to by law. ADA. But, thinking about it ruins the joke.[/QUOTE]
Another reason: you could walk up to a drive-thru ATM. It's not inconceivable that that may be the most convenient way for someone to get to an ATM, blind or not.
[QUOTE=chappy;345471]So this blind guy decides to go skydiving, and all his friends are stilling around with him drinking and trying to talk him out of this crazy scheme.
...[/QUOTE]
First-time skydives are (always? usually?) ones where you have a guide strapped to you. I'd guess that a skilled guide and a blind person would have no problems skydiving safely. [URL="http://www.skydivingmagazine.com/questions/ques21.htm#Do blind people skydive?"]Some blind people can even learn to skydive solo.[/URL]

[url]http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/how-many-surrealists-does-it-take-to-screw-in-a-light-bulb-a-fish-the-most-highbrow-jokes-in-the-world-8691191.html[/url]

[QUOTE=Mini-Geek;345488]First-time skydives are (always? usually?) ones where you have a guide [u]dog[/u] strapped to you.[/QUOTE]

Fixed it for you. :P

Time to get dinner ... until tomorrow, "arf wiedersehen", all.

[QUOTE=ewmayer;345508]Fixed it for you. :P

[/QUOTE]

:rofl:

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

[QUOTE=chappy;345505][URL]http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/how-many-surrealists-does-it-take-to-screw-in-a-light-bulb-a-fish-the-most-highbrow-jokes-in-the-world-8691191.html[/URL][/QUOTE]

:rofl: x 10 (at least)

3 English-as-a-second-language guys were discussing whether a woman they knew could become pregnant while practicing their English.

The first man decided,"She's impregnable." The second man stated,"No, no, no, she's unbearable."

Finally, the third man decided to settle things by unequivocably stating,"No, you're both wrong, she's inconceivable."

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4 Europeans were watching a performer on a street corner. In order, it was an Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spanish dude and a German. They were loudly complaining that they couldn't see what he was doing, so the performer jumped up on a wooden box and asked,"Can you see me now?"

They responded by saying "Yes." "Oui." "Ci." "Ja."

(For those who don't get the joke, repeat the words in order while thinking how it would sound to an English speaker)