[QUOTE=only_human;354524]I wish the next person on this thread develops halitosis.[/QUOTE]
Wish granted. Then on your next space walk in that space suit of yours, you and I are buddy-breathing with a shared oxygen tank and mouth piece.

I wish my owner would stop making me sit on this silly blanket with my fur all unnaturally groomed while he takes my picture and just give me some dandelion leaves.

[QUOTE=Brian-E;354530]Wish granted. Then on your next space walk in that space suit of yours, you and I are buddy-breathing with a shared oxygen tank and mouth piece.

I wish my owner would stop making me sit on this silly blanket with my fur all unnaturally groomed while he takes my picture and just give me some dandelion leaves.[/QUOTE]I can't tell if you are a hamster, rabbit or guinea pig. I thought that guinea pigs synthesized their own vitamin C but briefly communing with my friend Google tells me that rabbits do but hamsters and guinea pigs do not. In any case to be sure, squeak up for your dandelion leaves, they are high in vitamin C; If your owner does not comply, bite that scurvy rat, tear up the blanket and pull your hair out. He will take you to a vet, improve your diet and cease his beach blanket bongo photo marathon efforts. Wish granted.

I wish that the next person in this thread would take a breath mint.

[QUOTE=only_human;354534]I wish that the next person in this thread would take a breath mint.[/QUOTE]I did and nearly swallowed it. Had to get the Heineken manoeuvre to dislozenge it.:ick:

I wish my (non-drug induced) hours sleeping were twice as effective (per hour) as those of the average person.

[QUOTE=kracker;354513]Wish [URL="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ibjxoJuk1A"]granted[/URL].

I wish for the power of curtisc without the electric bill, and with no other negative consequences.[/QUOTE]
Sheesh! I just noticed what that link is. He must have really been tired of that card. Guess they had fun, though.

Oops. Wish granted. Your nukular reactor runs wild, melts down, and takes your farm with it.

I wish the nukular reactor also took G. W. Bush with it, preferably before the presidency of the US was stolen for him.

[QUOTE=kladner;355295]I wish the nukular reactor also took G. W. Bush with it, preferably before the presidency of the US was stolen for him.[/QUOTE]

Tragically, the kracker reactor disaster takes out half the country, including kladner and the former president. Nuclear techs argue about how it happened for decades to come.

I wish it was easier for me to learn Russian.

[QUOTE=CRGreathouse;355299]I wish it was easier for me to learn Russian.[/QUOTE]Wish granted! You are sent off to a gulag. You pick up Russian in no time (in all of that new 'free time').:jail:


I wish that my height and weight fit within the 'healthy' parameters for a human of my age and gender, with the proviso that either my height or weight remains unchanged.:showoff:

[QUOTE=Uncwilly;357236]I wish that my height and weight fit within the 'healthy' parameters for a human of my age and gender, with the proviso that either my height or weight remains unchanged.:showoff:[/QUOTE]

Wish granted.

You are now a woman.... :wink:

[QUOTE=Uncwilly;357236]I wish that my height and weight fit within the 'healthy' parameters for a human of my age and gender, with the proviso that either my height or weight remains unchanged.:showoff:[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=chalsall;357244]Wish granted.

You are now a woman.... :wink:[/QUOTE]
If you grant a wish, you must also provide a wish.

[QUOTE=Uncwilly;357256]If you grant a wish, you must also provide a wish.[/QUOTE]

Whoops... Sorry... Forgot that rule! :smile:

I wish that I was less forgetful.

[QUOTE=chalsall;357258]I wish that I was less forgetful.[/QUOTE]Wish granted. You are now 0.00000001% less forgetful and can now remember the 738th decimal place of pi.

I wish for all my minions to obey all of my commands without question.

[QUOTE=retina;447573]Wish granted. You are now 0.00000001% less forgetful and can now remember the 738th decimal place of pi.

I wish for all my minions to obey all of my commands without question.[/QUOTE]

Wish granted. The set of your minions has cardinality zero.

I'd like a cup of coffee.

[QUOTE=GP2;447590]I'd like a cup of coffee.[/QUOTE]Wish granted: 8oz of 200 degree coffee has been applied to your groin.

I wish all of the election talk would end already.